COURAGE.

I am not writing about resolutions this 1^st day of the year, but rather courage!

We can always resolve to do the needful, beautiful, fulfilling, life changing things in our lives. We can and should resolve to do them. But we must have courage to take the necessary and often times bold steps to move forward and actually do them!

I say be courageous this year. Move forward. Boldly go where you have not previously gone before.

Make those difficult choices for getting out of debt!

Join that gym or put that exercise DVD in the shopping cart, go home and start using it.

Shop for your food differently.

Time block.

Get up 30 minutes earlier.

Write something everyday.

Pick up that instrument and just play.

Schedule dates with your family.

Download that read your bible in a year plan.

Make a coffee date with that one person you need to apologize to.

Send out those thank you notes/notes of encouragement.

You know it, just start doing it. You are not stuck.

Have the COURAGE to live. LIVE. Starting today, not the way you always have, but rather the way you have always dreamed of living.

Happy 2011! It’s gonna be a good one!

Drama Ministry...more of the story!

So suffice it to say my life journey has detoured me from writing about drama ministry. But alas the story must go on.

Script writing has been an essential part of the drama ministry for me. I am not so uninformed to think there is not available material out there but it has just been the case for me that God would stir in my heart and mind the story He wanted us to tell.

The more I wrote, the more at ease I began to feel about the way God spoke to me, however in those first few years when I was reformatting a script or finishing someone else's work, it was a daunting task for me. I felt ill equipped and not nearly talented enough. But I had said yes to God and I had to trust that He would do it through me. Those first steps were baby steps though and coming to a place to write the entire script was a huge leap of faith for me.

Inspiration would strike in the strangest places. Sitting in church listening to the message, during my quiet time, while at the grocery store, while watching a movie, during prayer, when reading a book. I literally was in safeway one day when a song began playing and as if everything were in slow motion as I liked around other shoppers had taken notice of the song at the exact time and all of them were nodding to the music, in my head of course. I am not sure that really happened but I could see it as if it were real and it inspired a scene in the play. That's what it was like for me.

Regardless of when; what always seemed to transpire would be clear and colorful pictures and images with story to compliment. And then I knew I had to get to my computer, very soon and write. It was overwhelming how the words and dialogue would spill out onto the page and scenes formed then directions followed. Amidst the drizzle from my visions a play would appear, taking shape, color, characters, and form. The process amazed and stunned me at the same time.

My very first full script was Beautiful which was taken from the book of Ruth. My Pastor had just taught through the book and I had begun dreaming of these characters in full vivid pictures only in a contemporary setting. That was the beginning of the most intense writing experience. As I saw this story of Ruth unfold in my brain I began to fall in love with the people, the families, the faces that stirred my heart. I became so emotionally attached to Ruth and her life that when it came time to share the script with my team I was terrified. After-all they might not like it. And then what would I do? I had lived with this story for a few months now. Fifty pages that were practically written on my heart and I had to let others share their thoughts and opinions about it, uhg! I just couldn't do it!

So I let my husband and my kids have the first go. Of course they were kind and encouraging but I realized something, hmm they were also pretty biased. Next my good friend Monique and her family, they were so supportive yet honest. They seemed to like it pretty well and got very excited after reading it. Also they had some good input that really helped in the initial edits.

Next up was the meeting with the rest of the leadership team. I gave the script to the stage manager, set director, lighting tech, choreographer, and it was out there. No turning back now.

I had written a script, for a play, and we were going to perform it. I am really glad I never set much stock in the words I had written and knew that the story itself would come more to life as the actors began to fill the characters and that is exactly what happened. I was happy to liberally give freedom in lines, for the most part, especially in rehearsal where some great discoveries were made and also when I would run through a scene and then I could see where holes could be filled in and also what was needed to fill it out more.

God was so with me, at every turn. I believe He carried me through that year by giving me the most gracious team of actors and crew I could have ever worked with. For some reason every single one of us felt this project was of the Lord and became really attached to the characters and story.

So what I learned that year; true humility is essential to survival in rehearsal, complete surrender would make it easier for my feelings to not get hurt, allowing the entire team to take ownership of the story really brought the project to life, and God comes through. Every single time. We do not arrive, He stretches us and grows us more and more every single step we take with Him.

That year was a turning point for me. What obedience looked like that year for me, really, was the greatest gift I never imagined I would ever receive from God. He flowed through my heart, mind, visions, dreams, and creativity to bring together a heart warming and vividly colorful drama that to this day is my most favorite story.

He so exceedingly abundantly went beyond so much more than I could ever ask or think. He radically changed me and I am so grateful to have followed Him in this calling, even through fear and attack and doubt, He so brought me through!

It was BEAUTIFUL!

Raising Men.

Three sons, 20, 19, and 18.

As a mother I have loved every minute of having boys. I have always called them my little men, but it wasn't until the last few years that I really had a clear perspective of that.

A few years back my eldest was becoming a Pastor at the same time suffering heartache, my second son had been in two very expensive accidents costing his hard working self dearly, and my third son had almost died in an extremely harrowing car accident. Literally should have died, God spared him. As I struggled through the intensity of the seasons they were all in, the onset of waves of discouragement and fear that I was suffering at the time felt something a kin to an elephant sitting on my chest. I would ride to work with Lionel and say, it just aches in my chest. And he would remind me to breathe. It was often hard to find air.

A wise and godly friend was listening one particular day at work and she looked straight into my teary eyes and said, "Kristen you are not raising boys, you are raising men." It stopped my thoughts, yes screaming halt.

I was intent on her every word as she continued, "you have no idea what things God will use to bring them to manhood, but you mom do not want to hinder that." Hmm, no I don't.

I began asking the Lord about that, what I already believed to be true. He said to me...

Yes Kristen, let them go.

Now mind you Caleb was barely yet 16. I wasn't cutting him loose from parenting then, but I understood what God was saying, because in my heart I already saw the process unfolding. They were breaking away from us, from their mom, little by little. Only it had begun years ago. When they stopped jumping into my lap, or giving me kisses in front of their friends, or asking for a million stories at bed time, or wanting to be home just to play with their dad and me.

So my prayers changed dramatically. As they continued to rapidly catapult into adulthood several things were happening simultaneously.

I began to count down the days we likely had left for them in our home and thus frequent influence.
They began to question things more and more.
Spiritual attack reared it's ugly head over and over.
I felt less like a parent and more like a warden.
The truth hurt, we spoke the truth to them and their words back to us, though true stung too.
I realized they thought they needed me less and less.
They needed to make mistakes, hey when you think you know everything a few grand mistakes is enough to remind you that maybe you don't.
They increased in their desire for the extreme.
Life experiences became the utmost priority.
Wrestling through ideas and thoughts with anyone and everyone God included, now eminent.
They valued anyone who took them seriously, ignored everyone who did not.
Started referring to particular adults more like peers.
Trust and respect was not given as easily nor taken for granted.
No longer talked in we, us, and family, more I, me, and individualized statements.
No loner took my word for things.
Disagreed with our parenting per their years of experience being parented.

I am sure there are many more that I have not discovered. But while I ponder and still witness the transformations, I also am in complete awe of God.

He knows what He is doing, and He has instilled in our men a natural process from childhood to manhood, a passage of struggle if you will that to many appears more like crisis than development. But to which God has assured me is all in His care and part of His plan for them.

My perspective of God has changed through this process as He has given me such reassurances over my own son's hard times and conflicting ideals.

God is trust worthy. As I know that He is in them and there has been plenty fruit to that confirmation, He has the ability to parent them from the inside out.

He is able to bare all of their struggles and even their sin, this one is huge for me, as I of course am so unable to bare it. My heart ache alone for them is proof enough for me.

He reminds me daily that this, this season, this struggle, this growing, this breaking away, this confusion at times, even this pain, this is what He came for.

And this truth...one day standing in worship, front row, second seat in, knees shaking, heart pounding, hands trembling with grief over the latest blow, the song was playing ..."I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross..." God spoke to me.

Kristen, you'll never know how much it cost to see my SON upon that cross.

Oh Lord. No. No I would never have to suffer that pain. He did, so I would not. He understood more than I knew the heart ache of a parent. But He also understood more than I knew, every single thing He would allow across my amazing young Men's lives and He was worthy to trust with all of it.

So I am learning as I go here. Making so many mistakes along the way and God has told me He calculated those too. (He's so got my back!) And I am parenting in Faith and discovering what it means to parent adult children. It is likely the hardest season of parenting we have faced to date.

It is also the most exciting, most rewarding, most engaging and thought provoking time of our parental lives. We have been blessed with young Men that know, fully believe in, and trust God. How they walk with Him, what they believe about Him, where they find the strength to stand alone with Him without their parents, well this is between them and God.

We are still a part of this picture, our role has just transitioned to more fervent prayer warriors, counsel and advisers, teachers when asked, exhortation when welcomed, helpers when needed, only we are not the ones who get to initiate any of this, except for the prayer.

I am so proud of my boys, excuse me Men. I can not help it, they are so gifted, smart, strong, compassionate, loving, responsible, and loyal. It does not surprise me as these qualities are why I love their father so much.

And we have been blessed, to have God along side us as parents, He allowed us to fill up their cups overflowing with love, and show them that He was the one who filled ours. Now we get to see them let God fill them on their own.

There can be no greater joy.

Vulnerable.

Most of the time I am an open book.

I tell on myself. It is why I love to write and blog. But I have had a hard time sharing recently. As I have started several posts the past week or so and not completed and published any of them I stopped today to ask myself the question, why?

And I had an answer, I just don't have the energy to be that vulnerable right now. Hmm.

See I am walking with the Lord through some very personal things, working had, crazy busy with my teenagers, working hard on my home, finances, taxes, health, disciplines, ministry, SO MUCH! Too much?

Maybe.

Yesterday God told me that I didn't know I would face...fill in the blank; He played a tape in my head of some hard things that I have walked through this past year. And He sweetly said to me, but I did, Kristen. And I have seen you through it.

And today, it is so much, as I journaled again His never ending love for me, His constant care and Heart for me, His attention to detail, His hand of healing, His leading in wisdom, His goodness in my friendships, I am just so UNDONE by Him.

"the King has brought me into His chambers" Song of Songs 1:4

He has invited me in, where it is sacred and intimate, safe and beautiful; in the Lord's inner chambers I feel seen, known, understood, free.

Thank you, Father...just...(whisper) thank you.

Featured Artisan: the Real Estate Pastor?!

Do you know Lionel Wilson? Some of you do. He is my very favorite Realtor, Minister, father, husband, and friend.
Today Pastor Rob was teaching from Proverbs chapter 11. A passage which is near and dear to my Realtor husbands heart. So much so in fact that for the past several years it has been his business message and mission. Be a giver, have integrity, encourage others, speak kindly and without hypocrisy, build relationships, win souls and walk wisely.

Around 2005 God had been teaching Lionel many good but hard life lessons. One thing that spilled over to every area of his life is valuing people above everything. "Lionel I have called you to ask those I put in your path, what can I do for you," spoke the Lord. In business that equates to people before paycheck. The Lord told Lionel that work would be his ministry and God would be his provision.

Since that time Lionel has set out to be a servant in Real Estate. His passion for people has made such a striking impact, in what can sometimes be an unpleasant industry, that many people have lovingly called him the Real Estate Pastor. We chuckle when we hear this, but really it is true. Lionel prays with and for those that he works with. He gives wisdom that he believes is from God and not just regulated by market trends. As a hard working man he of course is diligent in knowing the business of real estate because he believes God would not want him to be negligent in any area and he sets out to do his best for the Lord in every scenario.

I can not say enough how much I have learned from Lionel in business. Over twenty years he has worked in some areas of sales and marketing. Several years he was a pastor as well, the truth is, he gets people, and people have always been his business.

He that waters is watered himself. Proverbs 11:25


This is the quintessential verse in chapter 11. Give to others and yes you will be yourself so filled and completely satisfied in life. God has blessed Lionel in so many areas of his life and especially in business. He is grateful and amazed. When many people were complaining of the real estate market and the "shift" that has occurred the past three years, Lionel set out to have his best year ever. God had put it on his heart to do so. And closing out 2009, he did have his best year in real estate ever, more than doubling sales the previous year. God is, faithful and He did provide.

So Lionel faithfully presses on to continue to follow hard after God, shepherding the flock along the way, for now that flock comes in the means of Real Estate.

I am so proud to work for such an honest and passionate man, and blessed to be married to him!

Better than wine...

Sometimes I do not know how to tell my story because it is still unfolding.

I think of my life as not having a beginning or an end but as a constant and ever changing circle. Like the earth spinning round and round, some times in the brightness of the sun, other times in the darkness of night, that is me and that is what healing is like.

So much has happened in my heart, to tell it all would mean that I understood it all, and I don’t and there is still so much to be discovered. But as I move through each day there are these glimpses, you know these tiny moments when I am on the outside looking in getting a God size perspective of what He is doing in me and I am so undone. Because He loves me, oh how he loves me, can you hear that song playing in your head...I can.

I am journal-ing Song of Solomon, as a prayer to God. A friend recommended it to me. As I am His beloved and He is mine. I am on verse two and this is my response back to my Lord, my Love today:

Nothing is more valuable than Your love. Nothing is more precious, more costly, more fragrant and more tasty. You grow this love in me that is You. You planted Your love in my heart like a seed that is planted and grows to a vine. Your love blossoms in my heart and bears fruit like luscious grapes in the vineyard full of juice and ripe from the sun. Your love brings the fullness of satisfaction to my soul like the fullness of flavor in a timely opened luxurious wine, pleasant, earthy, warm, delicate, and fragrant.

Your love is better than wine.

He loves you too, tell Him today, that you love Him back,

Featured Artisan: tribute to a daughter

This girl is artsy! No doubt about it.

There are so many things I could say about my dear 17 year old daughter. From birth she has inspired beauty and art in our world and she keeps on astounding us with her gifts every single day.Bethany is one of those lovely, bright blue-eyed, rosy cheeked, full of expression, verbally robust, laugh out-loud, girly-classic-vintage styled teen age girls that could really have been born in any era.

She is timeless.

She is one of the most talented actors I have had the privileged of knowing my entire life and I have known and worked with many.Bethany has been part of over 30 shows and is a joy to watch on stage, truly in any roll. But theater being among her first loves, she more than just graces the stage, she costumes, crews, stage manages, and directs. All with the skill, gifts, and responsibility to match most adults.
If that were not enough to boast of, and that is plenty believe me, she is also one of the finest hand stitching crafters I have ever seen. She has a knack for intricate details and fine hand sewn work. She loves to make scarves, hats, embellished hair accessories, purses, bags, etc. She started crocheting at the age of seven and she can make pretty much anything. She started sewing when she was 13 and she is learning to become a fine seamstress.

She has written some of the best papers her teachers have read and she wrote me a song and sang it to me while playing guitar. She taught herself for my last Birthday, which is one of my favorite Bethany moments.

She taught herself guitar! Yes she is very self motivated and when any one comes around that plays guitar she grabs hers and has them teach her a thing or two. She loves to sing loudly. She is growing musically as it has not come as easily to her as acting, she works even harder at it.

She loves Jesus! This is for sure one of the things that has motivated and propelled her in life. She has served and ministered with college age students since she was seven. Using all of her gifts for the Lord has given her the blessing of being so gifted and accomplished at such a young age.
We are SO proud of the young woman she is becoming and excited to see all that God has for her. I recently shared with someone, she is like a force that none can reckon with, except for the Lord of course and in my heart He keeps telling me, just get out of the way Kristen, I am doing all this in Bethany, do not hold her back!

Art in business!

I love work, really I do.

And I get to do some awesome, amazing things in my job. I work with my husband, we have a Real Estate business, he is the REAL-TOR. Yes that was on purpose it's not REAL-IT-TOR. People get that confused. And I am the Marketer/designer/book keeper, etc.

But what I love is the design elements. Laying out our marketing pieces, creating an interesting website or virtual tour or playing with the photos.

We are just re-listing this amazing house and I was playing in photoshop with a new effect I learned called TRIPTYCH which I thought would be perfect for the postcard we will send out to the neighbors. And BTW, here is a great teacher online for easy photoshop tutorials.


Isn't that fun, one picture, three panel artwork! This gives me great ideas for some artwork in my home too.

I love that my work compliments my craving for art, design, and creativity. I love that every day I get to do things that inspire me. I get really excited when our clients and Lionel like what I have created. It is wonderful to get to use my gifts in our business, it is a gift to ME to find that I can have a job and LOVE it too.

I hope my dear readers, you love what you do too!

Featured Artisan: Sarah Nelson

Introducing the fabulous and amazing young design talent, Sarah Nelson!

She is most definitely "CREATIVE" in His image. But before I go on about that, I just have to say that I have been a part of this girls life for several years now and to know her is to know a pure and genuine heart for the Lord.

Sarah, recently married and embarking on adulthood, has blossomed quite stunningly into an extraordinary designer and life artist. Here is a young woman, wife, new home maker, college student, daughter, sister, and friend that is inspiring and motivating so many of us, not allowing her gifting from the Lord to lay dormant.

What has seriously stirred my heart to write this post is how naturally she has emerged into this new season. Though yes she has always loved fashion and been interested in artistry, this I believe is something more.

As I think about the Lord and how He is the ultimate creative being, and we are created in His image, I have come to believe that we bring Him the most glory through using the creativity He has given us. It is my firm belief that He desires to see this part of Himself gushing from all of our lives.

Sarah has tapped into that stream and it is flowing beautifully. She LIVES her art creating a masterful setting for Gods beauty in her every day surroundings. It is amazing to see the wonderful texture, colors, sheen's, sparkles, shapes, and elements that have so originated from God's creation, interlaced in Sarah's style.

Now I know we all do not have the same flare and eye as one as gifted as Sarah, but we ALL do have gifts and should be encouraged by her to use and share them as God directs. I know I have been. But don't take my word for it, you can find her lovely ideas and sweet spirited words on her blog Frills for Thrills.

I am so blessed to see this young girl totally put her self, her heart, her art, and her life out there for all of us to see. It takes some courage and a lot of love. And I for one really appreciate it! Thanks girl. We are all excited to see what God has planned for this amazing avenue in your life.

Have a great day readers, and share some ART in life today!
(photos borrowed from Sarah)