Can vs Should...

Recently a friend was retelling a story where he quoted his wife saying "can and should are two different things." That statement has so resonated with me.

Especially in the area of taking liberties and personal rights.

I'll explain using "desserts" for my example, though you can insert anything into the equation.

I can have desserts any time all the time if I like. But I am walking a journey, a path that really I mostly should not partake of desserts. I don't desire the calories or the sugar. My body does not need it and I am also walking through this by the Lords leading, so you could say at times dessert might even be sin to me. If when I partake I feel I am compromising something in my heart, then yes it is me sinning.

Now that may seem silly to some I mean seriously Kristen it's only chocolate cake. True.

But many days of chocolate cake have lead me to become something I do not want to be, in the past chocolate cake was my way of comfort, was self medicating. Chocolate cake in and of itself has no power at all over me, it is the reason I need or want the chocolate cake I must be absolutely aware of.

So I must ask the Lord what is the truth in my heart about cake? Do I love it that much? No. Do I need it? No. Is it a stumbler for others around me? Maybe, at times yes. Does it taste awesome amazing? yes. Does the Lord desire me to enjoy food? Yes, of course or He would have made us with out taste buds. Haha.

So my conclusion to all these questions, thoughts, heart stirrings: I can have cake but I should not always have cake.

Now personal rights...

Here is where God has landed my heart concerning personal rights. It is not even an issue of liberal verses conservative. It is an issue of laying down our personal rights. As Paul spoke of so many times. If we can take liberties we also don't always have to.

If the Lord has said to me that He has called me to minister and serve in a certain area then with that He has asked me to surrender some personal rights. It is simple. I lay it down not for law sake, but for serving sake. I have the right to make these choices absolutely, but If I feel I need control over those personal rights above the Lord having control over them, the issue is not about "cake" it is something more all together.

What is my great need to exercise this right? What about laying this right down makes me feel threatened or challenged. Shouldn't it be simple? I love the Lord more. He has asked, that settles it correct?

What if someone else asks? My husband? My Pastor? Another I am in ministry with or respect? Are they as important, are they less important than my personal right? These are the thoughts I ponder with the Lord and in the end between the Lord and my heart, He has settled me on this: the relationship is more important than exercising my personal right.

That settles it for me.

When we can get to a place in our hearts, and please know I am still working to get there, but a place where we truly know it is all the Lords anyways? Then it is easier to let go of things like, our time, our money, our sleep(yes that is a huge one for me), our food, our comforts, our style, our preferences, our gifts etc. None of these things are bad, please hear my heart in this- God certainly does bless us with all of these things and more. But keep them in His perspective and lay them down before Him and you will not feel robbed of any personal right, because you know in surrendering it-

God has our back.

He has our hearts in mind always, always.

He may be asking us to lay something down to assure our hearts, we love Him more.

It's good for me to know. He is better. He is way better than chocolate cake! Haha.

House of Charis

I recently had the blessing of spending the entire weekend with my girl's house, the House of Charis. It is a Christian women's house for college students that our church owns. My daughter Bethany is in her first year as a resident there.

I was so amazed by these young women. And honestly my faith was so stirred by them. They invited me to speak/share and I was so happy to have the opportunity. But I went away from the weekend enriched by them. They taught me. Here are a few ways I was encouraged by this weekend...

Young women truly loving one another.
Young women serving.
Young women worshiping.
Young women giving.
Young women encouraging.
Young women studying.
Young women blessing.
Young women praying.
Young women speaking words of health and life.
Young women laughing.
Young women with joy. Real joy.
Young women sharing.
Young women holding each other up.
Young women journaling.
Young women listening. Intently.
Young women willing to be vulnerable.
Young women seeking Jesus heart.
Young women searching their own hearts.
Young women being sisters.
Young women being friends.
Young women on the verge of becoming.
Young women being accountable.
Young women leaders.
Young women responsible.
Young women of God.

In a house of around 50, maybe 40+ were there with us. And it was beautiful.
These young women are beautiful and this is a powerful work of God.
Where women live in a season of life that is often times demanding, challenging, confusing, tempting, soul searching, these women have chosen to live beautifully in the arms of Charis(GRACE).
Literally in each others arms.
In Jesus arms.

Girls, thank you for sharing this with me.